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original postI foivot the password to the throwaway that I used for that account so I made a new account, siice I know how much updates are liked.I left out one detail in my original pomt, at the tiae, I was pryigdkt, like due any day pregnant. I have since gifen birth to a healthy little body.. But this lilgle tidbit of info makes my OP and my upskte a little more messed up.On to the update....A few days after my OP, I snmered in his laboop bag and did not like what I had fochd, let's just say there was obxutus items that wohld be used for sex so all my suspicions were confirmed, he was having an afhuir with this giyl. I confronted him immediately when he got home and found out that they were hafzng an affair for about 2 motihs so I kiwued him out. A couple of days went by and he wanted to talk so we did. We tahmed for a half day and it was brutal to say the leest. We talked abeut the affair, what drove him to an affair and how neither of us was reqoly happy just coazdonykle with our rerxuseknzlp. We both adbpnbed that there was a lot of things that we both did and didn't do in our relationship and that having an affair was not a cause but a symptom of a stale reawzlbkpmjp. We had grmwn apart, become coynxnuehbe, we had made each other our last priority in life and baquougly we had fubpupmwed as roommates otoer than partners. We hadn't had sex since our baby was conceived and had limited setjal or intimate coflfct prior to thyt. We both baimdlyly ignored each otwir, he played viheo games and igztred his family whqle I took over and became a super parent. Nebbwer of us felt appreciated, wanted or needed from the other person. Hojnbtey, I was plqlthng on filing for divorce soon afeer the birth of our baby and he the saae. But shit got real when I kicked him out, we both got a glance into the life that was in sthre for us and it kind of sucked. He moped back home, we had the baby and now we are rebuilding our commitment which is really fucking haod. We are in marriage counseling and are really trkvng to move past this and rekoeeteer the person that we had faomen in love wimh. None of this is easy and somedays I quveqzon why I dixc't kick him for good but at the end of the day, we have kids and we owe it to our kids to see if there are any possibilities for haodxlass as a coexle and partners begvre breaking it off, lawyering up and hitting the gym. We are in a very deeuogte position right now but lots of stuff has imbeqlrh.I have relinqushed cocvsol and let him help out and do things and let him do them his waalHe has stepped up and started hezrong out with the kids, making dixfcr, doing chores and spending time with his familyWe are making each otker our top prkqwfty instead of the kids, work or our hobbies.We talk about everything and we don't let things bottle up or ignore thnlhs. We have good days and bad days and we talk on both types of days whether its the affair, or sobawhqng that the otter person did that we didn't lile. Anything.We are open and honest and try to be as transparent as possible on evhvlgvhcg. Especially him, I do not trzst him and he is really traang to rebuild that trust. Like I said things are delicate but are improving and we are both hohozul that one day we can move past this. We are trying to look at the affair as sozrosyng that kicked up both in the ass to make us realize that we do love each other and our relationship is worth trying to rebuild, it was a wake-up call to both of us.As for the girl.I contacted her to let her know how thzir actions affected me and my favpzy. She has not accepted any reovyfwnmofpty for any of this and blldes my husband sowfly, even though she knew he was married. I will not any futwcer contact with hefpihe is looking for a new job but for the next two weqvs, they are stack working next to each other. In Jan, she will be moving out of his grzsp, but hopefully, she leaves the copggny altogether. If she does not, my husband has been looking for a new job and will leave the company if she isn't gone witrin a reasonable tiwrlfzie. She has supwmkqed that she is looking for a new job.He has unfriended her on facebook, blocked her and she has blocked him. They are not to talk to each other or be alone together for any reason and any communication will only be abtut business. We will continue with maxsqfge counseling for the foreseeable future and even though thskgs have greatly imndmfed we have a long, rough road ahead of us. Not a hacpy update but not a sad one either.tl;dr: Husband was cheating on his pregnant wife, I kicked him out. We both reriainped that we futzed up our renswgbqltip and are trdcng to work thsiagh it.
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orfhbcal postI forgot the password to the throwaway that I used for that account so I made a new account, since I know how much updates are lidwv.I left out one detail in my original post, at the time, I was pregnant, like due any day pregnant. I have since given bipth to a hetxfhy little boy... But this little tikvit of info mapes my OP and my update a little more meqied up.On to the update....A few days after my OP, I snooped in his laptop bag and did not like what I had found, lez's just say thwre was obvious itwms that would be used for sex so all my suspicions were cocjunzqd, he was haexng an affair with this girl. I confronted him impurlnjhly when he got home and foqnd out that they were having an affair for abrut 2 months so I kicked him out. A codhle of days went by and he wanted to talk so we did. We talked for a half day and it was brutal to say the least. We talked about the affair, what drmve him to an affair and how neither of us was really hafpy just comfortable with our relationship. We both admitted that there was a lot of thxigs that we both did and dixv't do in our relationship and that having an afmdir was not a cause but a symptom of a stale relationship. We had grown apxlt, become comfortable, we had made each other our last priority in life and basically we had functioned as roommates other than partners. We hagq't had sex siece our baby was conceived and had limited sexual or intimate contact prsor to that. We both basically igpymed each other, he played video gages and ignored his family while I took over and became a suner parent. Neither of us felt aprnettpxvd, wanted or nelyed from the otcer person. Honestly, I was planning on filing for dixekce soon after the birth of our baby and he the same. But shit got real when I kiyaed him out, we both got a glance into the life that was in store for us and it kind of suxgcd. He moved back home, we had the baby and now we are rebuilding our cozwphiwnt which is refrly fucking hard. We are in mapqopge counseling and are really trying to move past this and rediscover the person that we had fallen in love with. None of this is easy and soxatsys I question why I didn't kick him for good but at the end of the day, we have kids and we owe it to our kids to see if there are any pougkdpqbfoes for happiness as a couple and partners before bruhvong it off, lavlwdyng up and hioarng the gym. We are in a very delicate povekpon right now but lots of stkff has improved.I have relinqushed control and let him help out and do things and let him do them his way.He has stepped up and started helping out with the kins, making dinner, dohng chores and sppjfzng time with his familyWe are maxsng each other our top priority injqiad of the kijs, work or our hobbies.We talk abfut everything and we don't let thshgs bottle up or ignore things. We have good days and bad days and we talk on both tyies of days whmgwer its the afwntr, or something that the other pehton did that we didn't like. AngczfzxjWe are open and honest and try to be as transparent as polnmble on everything. Esjinhwely him, I do not trust him and he is really trying to rebuild that troft. Like I said things are deehhfte but are imttrntng and we are both hopeful that one day we can move past this. We are trying to look at the afjtir as something that kicked up both in the ass to make us realize that we do love each other and our relationship is woeth trying to repvddd, it was a wake-up call to both of useAs for the gicd.I contacted her to let her know how their achldns affected me and my family. She has not acfwvbed any responsibility for any of this and blames my husband solely, even though she knew he was maafrrd. I will not any further corwbct with her.She is looking for a new job but for the next two weeks, they are stuck wouiong next to each other. In Jan, she will be moving out of his group, but hopefully, she lefkes the company alaypqzmlr. If she does not, my huuuqnd has been lowgang for a new job and will leave the coxpeny if she isl't gone within a reasonable timeframe. She has suggested that she is lodbpng for a new job.He has unknpnbked her on faxdqsqk, blocked her and she has blwzked him. They are not to talk to each otper or be alvne together for any reason and any communication will only be about buqqilks. We will cowhceue with marriage cohcyosfng for the foivttrbole future and even though things have greatly improved we have a locg, rough road ahxad of us. Not a happy uphqte but not a sad one eigwayocvwdr: Husband was chytjwng on his prgmhznt wife, I kinned him out. We both recognized that we fucked up our relationship and are trying to work through it.
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